I am about to share a secret that was never supposed to leave the elite group it concerns. But alas this group has been torn apart by the system, never to be the same.
Ok, it was Denys Holland Lodge, and the residents of its ground floor, who were made to move out at the end of the term.
Despite the £110 that we so kindly donated to University College London for every week we lived there, they were unable to provide toilet paper to use in our shared bathrooms. This meant that immediate action was needed. After much deliberation, we decided to follow the actions of a group mentioned in a book of "Simon Mayo's Very Worst of Confessions", a feature of his Radio 1 breakfast show.
Thus we, the 12 or so housemates, supplied the floor with toilet roll from any source possible. The university departments, the student union, shops, restaurants, offices and even the Swedish Embassy in London. Our total for the year was. I believe, in excess of 200 and at our peak, we had over 70 toilet rolls nestling on the window sill of our shared kitchen.
The cleaners, Pilar and Linda, were somewhat bemused, but being so nice, left the rolls alone, and even used some in the shared bathrooms.
Timmâge
Monday, September 27, 2004
Friday, September 24, 2004
Butlins Bognor - The Hottest Place on Earth
Last Wednesday Chelmsford Songsters had the pleasure of visiting Butlins at Bognor Regis for the Salvation Army's holiday week, New Horizons.
We met at the hall and boarded the coach, and were expectant of a bit of banter.
Sadly we were slightly disappointed, as there was very little to be had. We did amuse ourselves by making SP&S stay open so we could "browse". We also ridiculed Edie McCredie (that is, Mike!) for his dodgy hair, his lack of job and generally for being Mike!
Speaking of hair, we were all quietly pleased when Hayley got her hair done. It only took her 3 attempts!
When we finally got there, we chilled with some drinks and copious amounts of Bourbon biscuits. It is worth noting that Bandmaster Don Jenkins (whose name is still a name when you swap the first letters around, Jon Denkins) looked marvelous in his Dutch Army uniform, in a desperate attempt to look like Glenn Miller, the US Air Force pilot.
The stage we were on was obscenely hot, and some of us were sweating before we even started. We started off with a few serious slow numbers, and it became evident that it was going to be a Dunmow Flitch type engagement, where the punters applaud everything. We moved into the congregation for a few songs, and Edie and Hayley led those at the back in the dancing/swaying/general silliness!
After a few attempts, Garry got his tuba solo in, and we moved on to the epics that are "The 12 Days of Butlins" and "When the Saints". Completely exhausted and very hungry (they didn't give us tea!) we made our way home.
Unfortunately I wasn't on the coach on the way home, so I can't report the silliness of that occasion.
However I did tell my parents before we left that I need the loo, and I did not get there until we got back to Edgware, as we didn't see any services and McDonalds shop was closed!
Toodles!
Timbo
We met at the hall and boarded the coach, and were expectant of a bit of banter.
Sadly we were slightly disappointed, as there was very little to be had. We did amuse ourselves by making SP&S stay open so we could "browse". We also ridiculed Edie McCredie (that is, Mike!) for his dodgy hair, his lack of job and generally for being Mike!
Speaking of hair, we were all quietly pleased when Hayley got her hair done. It only took her 3 attempts!
When we finally got there, we chilled with some drinks and copious amounts of Bourbon biscuits. It is worth noting that Bandmaster Don Jenkins (whose name is still a name when you swap the first letters around, Jon Denkins) looked marvelous in his Dutch Army uniform, in a desperate attempt to look like Glenn Miller, the US Air Force pilot.
The stage we were on was obscenely hot, and some of us were sweating before we even started. We started off with a few serious slow numbers, and it became evident that it was going to be a Dunmow Flitch type engagement, where the punters applaud everything. We moved into the congregation for a few songs, and Edie and Hayley led those at the back in the dancing/swaying/general silliness!
After a few attempts, Garry got his tuba solo in, and we moved on to the epics that are "The 12 Days of Butlins" and "When the Saints". Completely exhausted and very hungry (they didn't give us tea!) we made our way home.
Unfortunately I wasn't on the coach on the way home, so I can't report the silliness of that occasion.
However I did tell my parents before we left that I need the loo, and I did not get there until we got back to Edgware, as we didn't see any services and McDonalds shop was closed!
Toodles!
Timbo
Tim The Hamburger
As you probably know, I have recently been in Hamburg for a bit of a holiday. There isn't really much to report, as I went alone. There is therefore no banter as such to report.
It should be noted however that I broke my own personal record for greatest number of German sausages consumed in a 7 day period. After a slow start by not eating any on Monday, I had one on Tuesday and Wednesday, a single sausage on Thursday, four on
Friday, and one per day from Saturday until Monday. Yes, 10 Bratwuerst in 7 days. That of course does not include the 2 Currywuerst I ate in between.
Whilst there, I managed to blag 3 days in Berlin, if was willing to sleep in the primary room of an Army hall. Needless to say, I went. I visited various landmarks whilst there, including Checkpoint Charlie. This was the 3rd Checkpoint between East and West Berlin. It was here that I took a rather interesting photo, which shows that the Internet isn't all is cracked up to be.
I saw a sign offering a photo "mit uniformierte Soldaten" which means "with a uniformed soldier". However they had done an internet translation from German into English. That would be fine, had they not translated "uni-formierte" which, of course, means "university formed". That had the same problem in Dutch too!
Anyway! I had a great time, and I will probably upload some pictures over the weekend.
Later on you will get yourself a write up of the Songster trip to Bognor Regis! Aren't you just the luckiest?
Yes. You are.
It should be noted however that I broke my own personal record for greatest number of German sausages consumed in a 7 day period. After a slow start by not eating any on Monday, I had one on Tuesday and Wednesday, a single sausage on Thursday, four on
Friday, and one per day from Saturday until Monday. Yes, 10 Bratwuerst in 7 days. That of course does not include the 2 Currywuerst I ate in between.
Whilst there, I managed to blag 3 days in Berlin, if was willing to sleep in the primary room of an Army hall. Needless to say, I went. I visited various landmarks whilst there, including Checkpoint Charlie. This was the 3rd Checkpoint between East and West Berlin. It was here that I took a rather interesting photo, which shows that the Internet isn't all is cracked up to be.
I saw a sign offering a photo "mit uniformierte Soldaten" which means "with a uniformed soldier". However they had done an internet translation from German into English. That would be fine, had they not translated "uni-formierte" which, of course, means "university formed". That had the same problem in Dutch too!
Anyway! I had a great time, and I will probably upload some pictures over the weekend.
Later on you will get yourself a write up of the Songster trip to Bognor Regis! Aren't you just the luckiest?
Yes. You are.
Bluejacking
Those of you who are au fait with mobile technology will know of the fairly new method of wireless communication called Bluetooth. It is, in effect, wireless communcation between phones, PDAs, computers, printers etc over a range of ~10 metres. If you have a bluetooth device, such as my new K700i, it is possible to send and receive contacts from your phonebook to other phones. This can be used to terrorise random people on trains, on the tube and just about any public place. If you receive a message saying that you have been "Bluejacked by the Magic" then it's probably from me! Telling people they have a nice suit, or that their shoes are untied is great fun, and especially freaky when you receive a message on the tube.
Here is a site about the phenomenon
Bluejacking
Here is a site about the phenomenon
Bluejacking
Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Chris Tarrant Philosophy
Those of you who have seen this site in the past few weeks will notice that one of the longer, and in my opinion better, posts has disappeared.
This post was said to be causing offence to people, and I received a few angrily worded emails about it.
As a result of a request from several people, I have taken the post down, though I may repost it later after some editing.
This brings me to the point of Chris Tarrant Philosophy.
When Tarrant presents 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' he often says to contestants who have just got a question wrong that the question is only easy if you know the answer. This ties in roughly with the goings on of the past few weeks. My Reading Festival was only really funny to those who know me, my background, surroundings, sense of humour etc.
For a start, I knew full well that 'Shinfield Rd' is not called 'Shenfield Rd'. However when we pulled into the road, Lou said "Ooh! Shenfield Rd" before we corrected her. This of course is not funny, unless you know that the next decent sized town from Chelmsford is Shenfield.
Secondly, do people really think that my friends are so insecure that they would be "nearly suicidal" (as Lou was said to be) over a guy she had been texting for a few weeks? In actual fact she had made a special effort to go to Reading to see Jonny, and was a bit upset on the way home. She was not too upset to drive, and never intended to drive home. Lou drove there, Jo drove back, that was always the plan. I just played on that for the sake of humour.
So in conclusion, the post was only really funny if you knew what was going on. Sorry to anyone who was offended by the post, and I hope you can appreciate this apology.
I was a little troubled to receive two strongly worded, and in places, offensive emails, but I forgive you in Christian love.
The festival itself, which only got a 3 or 4 line write up was amazing. The band played an amazing rendition of 'Glorifico Aeternum' and to put together such a big festival with such a small group. Yes, I was touched, and it was a great spiritual evening. Unfortunately the write up got lost in the banter of the day.
So, a clean start, and I will be back later with my Hamburg write up, and maybe a bit on the Songster's trip to Bognor!
Timmage
This post was said to be causing offence to people, and I received a few angrily worded emails about it.
As a result of a request from several people, I have taken the post down, though I may repost it later after some editing.
This brings me to the point of Chris Tarrant Philosophy.
When Tarrant presents 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' he often says to contestants who have just got a question wrong that the question is only easy if you know the answer. This ties in roughly with the goings on of the past few weeks. My Reading Festival was only really funny to those who know me, my background, surroundings, sense of humour etc.
For a start, I knew full well that 'Shinfield Rd' is not called 'Shenfield Rd'. However when we pulled into the road, Lou said "Ooh! Shenfield Rd" before we corrected her. This of course is not funny, unless you know that the next decent sized town from Chelmsford is Shenfield.
Secondly, do people really think that my friends are so insecure that they would be "nearly suicidal" (as Lou was said to be) over a guy she had been texting for a few weeks? In actual fact she had made a special effort to go to Reading to see Jonny, and was a bit upset on the way home. She was not too upset to drive, and never intended to drive home. Lou drove there, Jo drove back, that was always the plan. I just played on that for the sake of humour.
So in conclusion, the post was only really funny if you knew what was going on. Sorry to anyone who was offended by the post, and I hope you can appreciate this apology.
I was a little troubled to receive two strongly worded, and in places, offensive emails, but I forgive you in Christian love.
The festival itself, which only got a 3 or 4 line write up was amazing. The band played an amazing rendition of 'Glorifico Aeternum' and to put together such a big festival with such a small group. Yes, I was touched, and it was a great spiritual evening. Unfortunately the write up got lost in the banter of the day.
So, a clean start, and I will be back later with my Hamburg write up, and maybe a bit on the Songster's trip to Bognor!
Timmage
Monday, September 06, 2004
Tim's Move
I hope you will all be glad to hear the move went OK and we are all nicely settled in in Edgware.
I am currently sat in the departure lounge at Stansted, ready to head off to Hamburg for a week.
Please note that Rev. Nick is not homosexual in his conducting, merely alarmingly camp.
Stay safe everybody, and I will see you when I get back from holidays (!) and I should have t'internet back!
Tim
I am currently sat in the departure lounge at Stansted, ready to head off to Hamburg for a week.
Please note that Rev. Nick is not homosexual in his conducting, merely alarmingly camp.
Stay safe everybody, and I will see you when I get back from holidays (!) and I should have t'internet back!
Tim
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